Estimated read time: 2 minutes
We’re in the homestretch of potty training, which includes copious dance parties, harmonious jumping hugs, and celebration Smarties. Yesterday I was using the toilet myself and my favorite little face poked his head around the door slowly, smile as wide as the Cheshire Cat’s. Realizing what I was doing Ollie said:
“Mommy! I’m so proud of you!”
Of course, he is repeating what Craig and I tell him each time he successfully pulls his pants down and uses the toilet.
It’s been a while since someone has told me they were proud of me for using the toilet successfully, probably 27 years or so. At the risk of sounding totally juvenile: it felt nice.
If we put every piece of parenting advice in a big pile, the massive mound would be so large, it could break off from planet Earth completely and float out into the galaxy as its own planet. You can get lost in the world of childrearing knowledge, treading deep water to find validation for whichever method you choose and reasons to scold the parents who do not agree with your techniques for breaking up a toddler disagreement.
There is a lot of agreement that you should not build your child up and make them feel like royalty every time they do something mundane like using the toilet. To that I would say: “Mind your own beeswax, this is working for us and Ollie IS a little prince, thank you very much.”
It’s actually incredible how well the Smarties bargaining has worked, and they’re small and cheap so if we’re still using them as barter when he’s 17 we’ll be okay.
I’m not one to raise a child constantly looking for praise for the most basic daily tasks, incapable of being independent and completing chores without reward, and I don’t think that’s what we’re doing. Ollie says please and thank you on his own and gets up every time he falls down, but am I proud of him for no longer pooping his pants? Heck to the yes.
As an adult, I can pay my property taxes and change the oil in my car and eat the suggested amount of fruit and vegetable servings in a day and still pat myself on the back for doing it all. In a world obsessed with productivity and climbing corporate ladders and getting ahead in every way, where depression and anxiety are rampant and self-care is a rare commodity, I think we should be proud of ourselves each day.
We are all working way too hard to make ends meet and doing a million and one things because society tells us we have to. And truthfully, I’m proud of myself for how hard I work and the Mom and Wife and Friend I am each day. But I can also be proud of myself for relieving my bladder sometimes. And you should too. Get yourself a Smartie, kid, you deserve it.
proud of you best friend
This literally made me laugh out loud. It also made me crave a sleeve of Smarties. Good job!